Spring is a time of renewal, reevaluation, reawakening… truly getting a FRESH start right? I bet many of you see spring as a time to spring clean your home, organize the office, get the garage in tip-top shape… am I right? Good stuff…but what about spring cleaning of the mind? The energy Spring gives us may be the perfect time to make some good changes and adjustments to the way you think which most definitely will impact the way you feel. Soooo…take in a deep breath of that fresh Spring air and make a list of what changes you can make this season. Here are a few suggestions…
Embrace your struggles.
Neil Gaiman has a quote I love: “Make Mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly you’re Doing Something.” Any of my clients reading this, will know this is a message I talk about often. Our growth comes from the tough times, not the easy times. Perfection does not breed happiness. I believe happiness comes from increased self-awareness. When we go through struggles, we come out on the other end with knowledge of who we are and how we have become h3er after the struggle. That is self-awareness! Something no one can take away from you. So if your focus is to avoid making a mistake, maybe it’s time for some change… Take some risks and learn about yourself.
Use your empathy.
Here’s another good quote, this one from Dr. Oz: “The opposite of anger is not calmness, its empathy.” The definition of empathy is the ability to perceive a situation from another person’s perspective…putting yourself in their shoes. Is it not sympathy or feeling sorry for someone. It is the ability to see the world as others experience it. If you want to connect to others on a deeper more intimate level, this is imperative. In every relationship – with spouse, partner, children, family, friends, co-workers, etc.- you can enrich these relationships, maybe find some forgiveness, and strengthen your bond with others. Empathy connects us as humans and is imperative to increase understanding and love.
Rid yourself of toxic people.
Empathy is great! That being said, it is okay to “declutter” your life of toxic people. Not everyone is able to think empathically and those people can be difficult, negative, and toxic. Boundaries are important to maintaining a positive and drama-free life. Some people seem to get bored easily and feed on drama and conflicts to feel alive. Avoid them! What feels better than a good belly laugh? Surround yourself with people that keep you laughing and support you. And be grateful for them!
Rid yourself of your own negativity.
Love yourself first, because that’s who you will be spending the rest of your life with. If you constantly tell yourself, “I can’t,” “I’m not good enough,” or “I suck,” – you are becoming your own worst enemy. Self deprecating thoughts and self-doubt impede our potential for greatness and happiness. How do you do this? First, track the negative cognitions/self-talk as they arise and think about where they came from. Second, challenge those beliefs and kick those untruths to the curb. Third…replace them with positive, loving affirmations towards yourself. Trust me, with enough practice, this will become easier and easier. It is also important to minimize the negative stuff coming out of your mouth. Occasional venting can be helpful and relieve stress, but if you are constantly complaining and verbalizing old hurts – well, it will bog down your growth and positivity. “Dismantle your wounds so you stop living your life by them.” – Nikki Rowe
Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Sometimes life gets too difficult to handle alone. It takes strength to pretend everything is ok when it is clearly not. However, it takes even more strength to admit things are difficult and ask for help. That is the dilemma though – to admit something is wrong is a vulnerable moment for most. When needed, I encourage you to reach out to a trusted individual – usually anyone who is a worthy ally: a friend, family member, partner, ministers, healers, teachers, etc. (…and of course, therapists!) Asking someone for help gives you another perspective and can help you reappraise the situation from other angles. When we are stuck, we need someone to listen that isn’t in our head. That can be valuable and comforting! And remember… getting through a tough time is an opportunity for growth!
I hope you’re ready to get started on inner renewal!
We would love to hear about your list and how you are doing with it throughout the year. Good luck and happy Spring! We are here to help you with your growth and self-awareness if needed. Click here to call (760) 806-4350
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” – C.S. Lewis